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It's back to (stagey) school!

Posted on | By Sian McBride

The smell of gel pens and freshly sharpened pencils are in the air, parents are grinning ear to ear and the sun is finally out...which means only one thing – it’s back to school!

We all remember our favourite teachers from school. Their infectious passion and enjoyment for their area of expertise suddenly made double maths on a Friday the best place to be. So, imagine if you had a whole faculty of favourites, that's exactly what we've put together with our list of dream cast for our perfect stagey secondary school.

Head of Science: Doc Brown

Time flies with our resident eccentric scientist Doc Brown! Forget Bunsen burners, you’ll be burning rubber in his hair-raising hands-on lessons. Following his groundbreaking research into time travel and quantum physics, Doc will help you grasp scientific concepts through direct experiences, namely allowing you access to his infamous time machine. The DeLorean may look like an 80s relic, but the machine inside the boxy silver hood is lightyears ahead of its time. Doc Brown's constant quest for knowledge, and willingness to explore the unknown, will encourage you to be curious and inquisitive. However, this does not mean you should go headfirst into situations without any planning, as time travel can have unimaginable consequences, and if you misread the doctors’ calculations, it won’t just be your chance of an A* that will disappear… located in shed 088, the doctor is available for 1:1 appointments with all students...the first yesterday of every month.

🎫 Book your tickets to Back to the Future now.

Head of Art: Mrs. Doubtfire

Our highly decorated Head of Art has won multiple awards for her work in prosthetics. A legend with latex, the Scottish artist has set the world (and occasionally her classroom) on fire. Encouraging you to think outside the box and express yourself creatively, Mrs. Doubtfire celebrates students who challenge the norm and champions those who use different mediums to create art. Her favourite pieces have used whipped cream, lobsters, and fire extinguishers to create truly iconic scenes. Finding your voice as an artist is extremely important to Mrs. Doubtfire. In fact, it is so important that she even dabbles in voice over work in her spare time! Becoming an artist is akin to becoming a different person, one that is more empathetic, patient, creative, and intuitive than your ‘normal’ self. Mrs. Doubtfire is endlessly supportive of her students, with her door always open for those who may feel lost or adrift. There’s love in her art, and that is the tie that binds her with her students.

🎫 Book tickets to Mrs. Doubtfire today.

Heads of RE: Elder Price and Elder Cunningham

Our joint heads of RE are deeply passionate about their faith and beliefs, which translates into genuine enthusiasm from their students. In fact, their most recent class was so enamored by the teachings of Elder Price and Elder Cunningham, that they went above and beyond in their independent research projects, resulting in a full-scale musical of the Book of Mormon. Although the co-head's lectures on the sacred text do not always follow those that are widely believed by the organised religion, they have made the text more accessible to those who may not otherwise have been engaged with it. Unlike Maths or Science, our teachers believe that there are no right or wrong answers in RE and will encourage you to find your own connection with the holy bible, just like all-American hero, Joesph Smith did.

🎫 Book tickets to The Book of Mormon today.

Head of Philosophy and Ethics: Elphaba

Our wickedly talented Head of Philosophy and Ethics, Elphaba, makes all those who aren’t in her class green with envy. Your exam results will defy gravity after you’ve spent a term or two under the teacher's captivating spell. A top academic, Elphaba isn’t afraid to discuss controversial and thought-provoking topics, (which can make her unpopular with some of those in charge). Exploring themes of discrimination, prejudice, social justice, and the power society puts on appearance, Elphaba specialises in animal welfare. Fostering a spirit of intellectual curiosity and encouraging her students to challenge the status quo and fight for their beliefs, you will feel empowered and unstoppable if you are lucky enough to join Elphaba for her award-winning seminars. She can be hard to spot in the school corridors, but have no fear, if you need her, you will find her.

🎫 Book tickets for Wicked today.

Headteacher and Head of English: Miss Honey

Having taught Year One English since 2011, our new headteacher will be a familiar face to our younger students! We’re proud to confirm that Miss Honey has recently inherited the principles position. But fear not, this doesn’t mean she is out of the classroom for good, Miss Honey is well known for her kindness and genuine concern for her student's well-being, and she plans to stay in the classroom to be as close to her beloved students as possible. Proven to go the extra mile to help students succeed, Miss Honey will continue to provide additional resources and support to students who need it, opening her classroom and home to those who need a helping hand, or shoulder to cry on. Those who have been in her company know that her genuine passion for books and storytelling is contagious, encouraging you to let your imagination run free, as well as helping you develop a deep appreciation for literature and the English language. Miss Honey may have D-I-F-F-I-C-U-L-T-Y in believing in herself, but she believes in her students, and you, always.

🎫 Book tickets for Matilda today.

Heads of History: Ms. Parr, Ms. Howard, Ms. Cleaves, Ms. Seymour, Ms. Boleyn, Ms. Aragon

Our revolutionary History programme hosted by our heads of subject explores the lesser-known characters of Tudor Britain, shining a light on those that are often overlooked and unrecognised. The catchy songs penned by our trendy teachers are bursting with historical facts which make revision a doddle. No need for flashcards here, just a flash drive big enough to hold all their banging tunes. Our history teachers believe in bringing the past to life, they even dress the part, wearing modern versions of traditional Tudor attire to really make you feel like you have gone back in time. Although their classes are undeniably fun, don’t think you can take advantage of their good character. These teachers have had enough of bad behaviour and have been known to lose their heads!

🎫 Book tickets to Six today.

Head of French: Monsieur Valjean

Located in room 24601, Monsieur Valjean is our longest serving head, having taught at the school for 38 years! A native French speaker, Valjean teaches his students the history of his country, as well as the proper use of La Le and Les. You will be transported back to the early 1800s, a specialist subject for our proud Parisian, where you will learn about the people’s revolution, and the daily fight for survival they had to endure. Providing historical and cultural context to the language, helps you understand, not just the words and grammar, but also the broader cultural nuances. It also means that stock phrases such as ‘Which way to the swimming pool?’ and ‘I am 19 years old and live with two brothers’ are replaced with ‘Even the darkest night will end, and the sun will rise’ and ‘Will you join the revolution’. Although Jean Valjean was born in France, the language didn’t come easily to him when he was younger, in fact he was barely literate until well into his late 20s. His journey of self-improvement is a real inspiration to students who are looking to improve their own language skills.

🎫 Book tickets to Les Misérables today

Head of Drama: The Phantom

Specialising in mask work, The Phantom lives and breathes theatre (literally, he lives in a theatre). Dressed in black, THE uniform for performing arts students, The Phantom allows his students to take centre stage as he disappears into the background, watching on and directing from the wings. A highly skilled and creative musician, composer, and stage designer, The Phantom has a deep understanding of music and theatre production which helps the students put on truly spectacular end-of-year productions. Our head has an intense passion for the arts. This dedication to the craft is contagious and will inspire you to appreciate and love drama and the performing arts almost as much as he does. While his methods may be extreme, his ability to create captivating theatrical experiences for the past three decades make him a unique and compelling drama teacher.

🎫 Book tickets for The Phantom of the Opera now.